Spoilers

I don't have the opportunity to watch first-run movies very often, which is OK... I enjoy them just as much later. For example, I just watched Serenity a couple of weeks ago; I don't know what I was expecting, but that wasn't it, and I really enjoyed it.

However, I am very jealous of all the people that do get to watch a movie as soon as it hits the theatre, and then get to tell us behind-the-timers all those juicy tidbits that we recall years later and make us think, "Oh, yeah... I really wanted to see that one."

Then I realized I didn't really need to limit myself to movies that have come out in the last 24 hours. Consider yourself warned.

*Spoiler Alert!*

• The Wicked Witch is allergic to water. So are the aliens.
• Darth Vader, the Emperor, Obi Wan Kenobi, Padme, and Yoda all die.
• The ring gets destroyed.
• The Pope's son did it.
• It was all a dream.
• He actually died at the beginning of the movie.
• Despite all the disasters, and the painful, one-by-one loss of the crew, the mission is finally completed successfully.
• Pretty much everbody is going to die, but a few may survive in underground bunkers.
• The independent, rambunctious, disrepectful, but ultimately honorable, hero sacrifices himself at the end, and saves mankind.
• Chief suffocates him, then makes his escape by throwing a sink through the window.
• Luke and Leia are twins. So are Arnie and Danny.
• Lecter gets free.
• After the Nazi's faces melt off, the Ark gets stored in a giant warehouse.
• Dave returns as a moon-sized fetus.
• Mary Poppins really does do a topless scene.
• Finally, they manage to destroy the terminator.
• Only Ripley survives... oh, and the cat.
• Despite a series of comedic mishaps and misunderstandings, the couple does finally fall in love.
• Knowing how to identify obsidian can set you up for life.
• Despite his initial disinclination, Michael does end up following in his father's footsteps.
• In an enormous, fiery, slow-motion explosion, the enemy headquarters is destroyed.
• Though borderline insane, his genius ultimately propels him to success.
• It's actually Earth, in the future.
• He's possessed. So is she.
• There's a great nude scene with a really hot babe whose name I don't remember.
• All in all, it was worthwhile, but not without its flaws.

So there you have some drive-by reviews of a number of my favorite movies.